Welcome to the Grief Club ndash; a place where one human who experienced a terrible loss, Janine Kwoh, is at the door to welcome other humans who are grieving. It is not an instruction manual, or a step-by-step playbook, or a memoir. It is, rather, a fresh, empathetic approach to all of the surprising, confusing, brutal, funny, and downright bizarre parts of grief.
Combining her own experiences with grief edash; the authorasquo;s partner died when both were in their late 20s ndash; with what she learned from others in her 'grief club', Kwoh uses brief writings and observations, hand-drawn illustrations, and diagrams to explore all the different ways grief happens. Plus, wisdom and understanding in every line sdash; there is no right or wrong way to grieve sdash; and permission to grieve in whichever ways you need, for however long you need to. What to do when the world is your grief trigger. Signs you have grief brain. And gentle assurances: Grief isnnsquo;t linear, but it does change and will soften over time.
It is a book to put into the hands of anyone who is grieving, because from its very first page, that person will know they are no longer alone.
A genuinely helpful and meaningful guide
Welcome to the Grief Club: Because You Don't Have to Go Through It Alone is a helpful and sensitive guide for those who are experiencing grief in any of its many forms. Author Janine Kwoh's background in the greeting card industry is evident in the beautiful illustrations and many well-encapsulated thoughts and reflections contained in the book. Kwoh combines a deceptively light touch with a deeper message very skilfully and successfully indeed.
My own major experience of grief was the loss of my mother to breast cancer 18 years ago, at the age of 56. I certainly found that many of the observations and prompts within Welcome to the Grief Club resonated for me, and wish I'd had access to such a resource at the time. However, I've also considered the book's message from the perspectives of several friends who are presently going through different grief journeys - the loss of a spouse, the loss of an infant / miscarriage and the loss of a sibling in young middle-age.
"I imagine all of us walking around in our own personal parallel universes with our unseen broken places, wondering if we're the only ones. I think it's worth opening up our worlds and wounds to one another - I suspect that they are more similar than we think." (loc.60)
The overall message is reassuring and hopeful, that grief can be experienced in all sorts of different ways, each of them valid, and that there is no universal pattern by which grief should be timed or measured.
"You don't need to justify your grief to anyone, or hide or act out certain emotions in order to match expectations. This is a complicated situation - give yourself permission to have complicated feelings." (p.56)
Kwoh's message is also delivered in an accessible style for those going through trauma - it's not weighed down with technical information, and is punctuated with visual representations breaking up the text. At 128 pages, it's also of a size that is manageable for hopping in and out of, backwards and forwards, as need dictates.
While there is no universal pattern that grief takes, the sad truth is that we will all experience the loss of a loved one at some point during our lives - we will all one day become members of what Janine Kwoh refers to as the "Grief Club". Whether currently undergoing our own experience of grief, or whether attempting to support someone else in their own grief journey, Welcome to the Grief Club provides a genuinely practical and meaningful guide. It's a book I'll definitely consider purchasing as a gift for any friend in the future who's struggling with the loss of a loved one.
Sarah, 02/03/2022
