My story is not just the story of my boxing career. In fact, boxing is only a very small part of it.
I wrote my story to share my perspective of what it is like to be controlled by a need for perfection.
I wanted to be a boxing world champion. I wanted to be noticed. I wanted to be known. I put expectations of perfection on myself and over time, this obsession blinded me to reality and brought me down into a dark hole of depression.
I suppose I’d never really got over my fear of fighting. I wasn’t scared of being hit – far from it – I was scared to lose and scared to let anyone down. I trained hard and did everything to the best of my ability but I was constantly worried about disappointing the people who supported me. I put unrealistic expectations on myself.
When I realised I would never achieve my dream of becoming a boxing world champion, I was devastated.
But I’m one of the fortunate ones. I overcame the torment my mind put me through. It wasn’t easy and there were many false starts yet I did it. I now understand that achieving one goal is only a small part of life when you compare it to the bigger picture.
These are the lessons I’ve learnt. If I did it – you can too!
