My First Dictionary: Corrupting Young Minds One Word at a Time

GRANDMA'S DEAD meets GOODNIGHT, BUSH in MY FIRST DICTIONARY. British librarian Ross Horsley's first book is a laugh-out-loud parody that pairs classic illustrations from a real 1950s children's book with simple words whose satirical definitions reveal the nightmares of adult reality. Examples include:
"A puppy is a young dog. Connie gets a puppy every time she agrees not to tell. Daddy calls them hush puppies."
"A burden is a source of stress or worry. Old people are usually burdens."
"Caroline has a cut on her finger. She usually cuts her inner thigh."
"The big strong work men enthrall Daddy. They captivate him. He brings Deborah to watch them every day."
"Heather has nine valentines. One from each of the 7 boys she slept with this week...and the 2 girls."
"Father is nostalgic. He is remembering the happier times before you were born."