Most British people, when attempting to get by in France, decide to learn the language. This is a mistake. The French are itching to speak English. You will just annoy them by fumbling along in their language. No, speaking French can wait: to be French you need to go deeper. For example, when in Paris, what's the best way to urinate in the street? Why, exactly, should you look someone in the eye when you clink glasses with them? What is the proper attitude to the fine products of McDo's? How late can you be for an appointment? With your lover? Your boss?
In short, this modern guide to French culture aims to make you not so much functionally French as spiritually French. And when you do finally learn the language, you will already know that the proper form of address for the deity is tu.
