Hand-Me-Down Blues

How To Stop Depression From Spreading In Families

Many people have been led to believe that depression is caused simply by a chemical imbalance in the brain, and as a result they look to science for convenient answers, hoping that "a capsule a day will keep depression away." Unfortunately, this narrow focus on biology and the use of medications has often led people to overlook other important influences, such as how our family can affect emotional health in powerful ways.

In 'Hand-Me-Down Blues', Dr. Michael Yapko carefully describes how the family can play a crucial role in the development of and recovery from depression. Parents introduce their children to various life experiences and inevitably reveal their own values, perspectives, and biases. Children typically learn to interpret life events in the same way their parents do, and their interpretations can be a basis for depression. Once depression strikes, it distorts family relationships, splintering families as it spreads from one person to another like a virus. Thus, children can "inherit" depression less from their parents' genes and more from their parents' attitudes and behaviours. Consider, for example, how the behaviour of an emotionally inexpressive parent can affect a child who is hungry for eye contact, a smile, a hug and a kiss. "The family that does not know its own power to hurt or heal its members is a family at risk for becoming overwhelmed and, yes, depressed."

'Hand-Me-Down Blues' describes the family as a powerful agent not only in the development of depression but also in its resolution. Without blame, the book shows how families can deal effectively with depression, armed with much more than a prescription. Part I describes the nature of depression, including both its biological and social origins, and introduces you to a family systems perspective - how depression can be a reflection of what's going on in a family. Part II covers how you can acquire depression from your family, bring this negative influence unintentionally into your marriage, and unconsciously pass it along to your children. Part III offers specific methods to help diminish depression's influence on your family, including being responsible to others, building your family rituals, and developing realistic expectations. Dr. Yapko's solutions show you that you are not a victim and have more power than you may realise to change unhealthy situations and other people's responses to them.

Did you learn depression from your family? Maybe. But this is one family legacy you don't have to carry on. 'Hand-Me-Down Blues' shows how learning effective problem-solving and relationship skills can reduce and even prevent depression - something no medication can ever do.