A hilarious and acerbic alternative to more traditional baby record books.
Millions of people think children are the cutest, cuddliest, most wonderful creatures in the whole world. These people do not have children! They have nice things. They collect fragile pottery. They have candlelit dinners in fancy restaurants. They go to the cinema. They have white carpets.
People with children haven't been to a restaurant without plastic cutlery for years. The last film they saw in a real-life cinema with popcorn was 'Chariots Of Fire' . . . And their house looks like it was decorated by Fanny Craddock.
This book is for them. For years parents have been buying books to document all the precious moments in their baby's life - baby's first tooth, baby's first haircut etc. What have been ignored for too long are those "alternative" precious moments that really should be written down and celebrated - baby's first projectile vomit, to name but one. Otherwise one might forget them and make the foolish error of thinking of becoming parents once again.
