Honestly, everyone acts at least a little bit douchy when they're in college. This bitingly funny faux college guide ranks and showcases the douchiest schools across the United States and Canada (and across the pond), examining the type of douchebag native to each, including their special affectations, most popular majors, pickup techniques, typical saturday nights, 'overheard at orientation', thesis topics, mascots, and much more. The pertinent question for prospective students is, "What kind of douchebag do you aspire to be?" Here to help with this major life decision is the only college guide to rank and recommend schools based on their level of douchiness, including illustrated analysis of douchey student affectations, fashions, course offerings, school chants, pickup techniques, extracurricular activities, mascots, and much more. This rigorously researched, stereotypically accurate, gleefully offensive handbook celebrates douchbaggery as a many splendored thing - from yachty to sporty to thoughtfully bearded and beyond - and is sure to spark fits of pique and laughter among high school applicants, current students, and anyone who went to college.